See the Youtube video. It says it all really. My sister saved me in many ways thru my childhood. For this I am ever grateful. However, things could have been better even so had priorities been different. Better for just about everybody. There was some power there. But those were not the priorities my sister was ever willing to accept. She did for a brief time out of a feeling of impossible circumstantial obligation. And her and her partner actually behaved incredibly well all considered. And managed to be decent parents along the way while I floated around like an emotional orphan. So… good stuff.
But those priorities. I cannot accept them. I will never accept being so far beneath another human being in another’s eyes, regardless of the reasons or desperation. Given all the nonsense my childhood and even adult life has produced in the way of impossible situations, being forced into the lesser priority to whatever the immediate circumstance is (made up or otherwise). I will not be treated that way by my sister even. There is a better way. And I am moving toward it.
In the way of a lesson for those of you who may be reading or watching, I hope that folks can draw some relating points, some ways in which you perhaps fell down a similar rabbit-hole as me. Are you still protecting people at the expense of yourself? For very little reason? To little real benefit to the other? And at cost to you? Is this familiar? You don’t have to do this. If you choose to out of unconditional love, think of why you do that. If it is a true and charitable place, you rock. If it is a place of craving the satiation of some need, possibly primal and old and childlike and unpleasant to consider, then you really don’t have to do this.
Or perhaps you made a choice not to be responsible for another human being. And maybe you weren’t always graceful about this. But look around you. Is there anyone you are taking responsibility for in your relationships? A romantic partner or close family member which can’t take criticism, can’t handle any humility, just seem unable to face their own problems which ostracize friends and family at times, perhaps. What is that, if not taking responsibility for another human? Child or adult is irrelevant here. The choice here is exclusive. One at the expense of all. This sounds romantic. Perhaps it is. But it is harmful ultimately to anyone else who may need you and your love.
Be well everyone.